butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
I woke up in a strange girl's bed and rifled through her mail to get her name.
i'm sending her a home depot gift card for the hole i put in her wall. call it good?
KATE. I JUST NOTICED THAT LOWERCASE D'S LOOK LIKE SLIPPERS.
i was told that i was found face down in a plate of ketchup at the dinner table
i wrote down the address for planned parenthood on the back of the receipt for the condom that broke
she was pooping while we were on video chat. new level of love.
I feel like I got hit by a bus. A head on collision with my vag.
We fucked to showtunes. Never going out with a theatre major ever again.
Holy sore nipples Batman
he just cleaned his wound with pinnacle whipped
So yes we had an orgy last night and I sucked your tits while you fucked my husband but I am weird about sharing my toothbrush.
the bartender goes "wow its so good to see you sober" and gives me a hug
You told me you could hear my heartbeat through my penis but your methods were unethical.
Sixty five beats a minute. I stand by that.
I think I accidentally got a sugar daddy but I was already planning on sleeping with him so I’m going to see where this goes
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