That guy over there looks like a cartoon/action figure.
omg, i know.
we're too high.
I got into my dads silver toyota in the back seat to get picked up and 2 mins later I asked my dad when are we leaving, then an old mexican woman turned around. wrong toyota I'm guessing.
I was cleaning up my drunken mess and I found my ID in a cereal box
as my niece was drinking milk out of a crown royal glass i realized i dont think i've ever bought a glass that didnt come with a bottle of liquor....
I mean, there was frosting being put on a tunafish sandwich. Pretty sure she knew we were high.
soo how bad was i last night?
licking sour cream off of the table at pancheros bad.
Girl on the bus just slammed her book shut, turned to me and said "I'm way to fucking high to be studying"
i mean let's face it...the pregnant girl was really slowing us down.
hey dude, just got with the girl in H4. so mark H off the apartment list
haha we are half through our lease and already checked off 17 letters
YOU CANT FOOL THE TOILET
Get ready tonight we are going to get drunk and pierce my nipples
I found a Trump-humping republican virgin born on the goddamn Fourth of July. I NEED to hate-fuck him.
sober me is not impressed with the quality of people that drunk me gives our phone number to
He almost got to me tonight but then I was like fuck it I'm going to dance with a teli-tubby on the bar so fuck you
I came twice AND he sent me home with edibles. I think he’s a keeper.
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