I seriously wish I was FB friends with her
Halloween 2010: the NuvaRing girls. You're Thursday. We'll walk into the party chanting "Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday, Everydaaay".
She jerked me off while she drove us back from Denver going 70mph. It was both the scariest and most erotic moment of my life.
His body is like Jesus fingering me while I eat birthday cake
well on a positive note i hear those vitamins you take while pregnant do wonders for your nails
I'll try not to. I have an appointment at the hospital tomorrow so my goal is to wake up there.
Just bought a beer belt to complete the Captain America outfit. I will do my part as a hero of America to pass out beer to the good citizens of America.
Omg.....I raised my camera to take a pic at this presentation, and I wanted to zoom in, so I swiped my phone to the left and up pops my dick pic from last night.
I can't bring myself to turn around to see if pple saw it.
You don't care if I shave my legs, but you insist I be conscious for sex. Whatever. I really think your priorities are out of whack.
So I just bought e from my sophomore home ec teacher. How's your weekend going?
My girlfriend is pregnant with her exs baby. 2014 just became the worst year
He left for work so I drank pickle juice from his fridge
You tried to wave to Meg on Family Guy and got upset because she wasn't waving back
I danced my ass off after the funeral last night. Kept dropping it low and I can feel it in my legs today. Im like shit I needa go work out
What a way to honor the dead
So there we are, fucking beneath the Christmas tree and I glance up and see one of the local Jehovah's witnesses staring in horror through the decorative glass in the front door. I'm so proud of us.
Randomize
