Dude i fell asleep inside of her
thats awesome
When my girlfriend drinks sangria it's like winning the vagina lottery
turns out I still hate jay leno...even at 10pm.
i was trying to wake him up so i just kept touching his dick
He brought me bullshit flowers and a bullshit apology. Even shrek did more than that for Fiona. And he's an ogre. Does this not say anything about him?
Brownies hit. And just found beer. And the bill cosby show is on. And its in spanish.
Im glad the only reason we got out of bed today was to get Halloween candy on sale.
He expects to fuck my tits but will ignore me in public.
You are COMPLAINING that the sex was too good. You're not getting any sympathy from me
i found waldo and immediately set him to work eating me out. please have more out of season costume parties.
well he said my boobs made him believe in love at first sight so that's cool
It's a special kind of bond when your gay brother takes pics of you topless at a frat party.
She's officially a Tinder poltergeist.
i have too much dick at my disposal? i should make them fight. best dick pic gets laid
She's like a squirrel. She spazzes out all the time.
Randomize
