kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.
damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.
why dont you just whore around college until someone loves you...thats how it works for girls isnt it?
dont try to nair your balls. i speak from experience
How many times can you lose to your mom in beer pong before you can no longer show your face around campus?
I just remember taking her cat for a walk around 3 am then falling asleep in a slide at the park
I made him tell me how he proposed to his wife before I'd bang him. I have a problem.
I swear, its like my old fuck buddies have a 6th sense for when I'm going to be daydrunk. Then they start texting me. And then I start sexting them
He thinks he's a sex addict. Just. My. Type.
I just gagged from thinking about the amount of tequila we will be drinking. DRUNK TUESDAYS
I woke up in my own bed clutching a key to a Ramada in another state.
Okay I can't even be mad, I'm in mid-plot to hook up with Michael Phelp's third cousin.
He showed me his night stand drawer...it has one too many sex things in it.
Exactly how many...is TOO many?
I literally cut myself out of my pants. What is my life.
My face feels like a midget just gave birth to quintuplets
He's a waste of a perfectly good penis.
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