i freaking love being in a circle of guys. if i fart none of them suspect me.
Come on. It's already happy hour in Europe...Man up. "I'm at work" and "it's a tuesday" are not valid excuses.
We have to give a final comment in english, i think i might say "i learned it's a bad idea to make out with people in your classes who have girlfriends."
I'll have my TA grade the tests, she needs something to do anyway. Wanna race to the bar on segways?
We could be hammered at a childrens film. You failed me
What happened to the good old days when we whispered the words beer pong and people came running?
It's either gonna be a cock in my mouth or a burger. You decide which.
She had a glow in the dark pastie on her forehead the last time I saw her. That should help you find her.
Apparently HR frowns upon current employees introducing themselves to the new employee as "Hi I'm sleeping with your cousin"
The girl next to me looks like the young version of sara (bonnie hunt) in jumanji. I wanna be like PLAY THE GAME SARA!!!!"
Dont judge the spank bank, just be happy that you were deposited there.
What if for Halloween I paint my self gold and make sandwiches for everyone? I'd be a trophy wife! Get it?
do I look like a person who has full control of their limbs and existence on this plane of reality
All I could think about was how many vaginas had been on the toliet that I was pukin in
I don't know who's idea it was to get wine for a frat party but my poor pitiful hung over self really fucking hates them.
Randomize
