I need to go to a fraternity... my boobs are telling me to.
I'm driving behind a lime green VW that has "Seniors '10!" shoe polished on the rear window. i haven't even seen her yet, but I do have a boner.
Ohmy god im about to fuxk my TA. i thyought this was a dream but i love you. <3
All I had with a note saying that my shoes are in the ceiling and good luck.
Doing lines of coke with a $100 dollar bill off a 6in x 9in photo of your childhood self really tells you where you where you've gotten in life.
You were definitely doing something right. You could only see the colored parts of his eyes a couple of times. I was pretty sure he was dead at some point.
You told me if you could get your shoes on, you deserved a coke and rum. We never made it to the party.
You used up your allotted blow job minutes for the month of April last night anyways
She wanted to make popcorn, but the air-popper was broken. So she dumped the entire container of kernels into the clothes dryer. Drunk movie night was a success!
Puke, feathers, beads, and solo cups all on my way to class. I'm surprised anyone's alive after this weekend.
Ok, so technically yes she wore a red tank top to the stoplight party. But under it was a yellow bra and green panties.
It has gotten to a point where I just want to sit on his face. Less butterflies, more orgasms.
Sorry for drunkely attacking your best friend with a bow and arrow then loudly crying myself to sleep....PMS?
Just Peed in a cup for my country. Fighting the good fight.
I really need to stop sending pussy pics if I'm going to be running for state representative in November
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