The best feeling....farting and having the bubble hit your balls
I guess so. I don't really give a fuck. I think I'm going to jerk off really loudly tonight just to keep them on their toes
since when did accompanying a guy to a wedding mean that anal was required that night?
How do you tell if you're on the terrorist watch list?
he keeps calling me but I'm too scared to answer... Not sure what he's gonna yell at me for: barging into his room while he was with another girl, filling her shoes with dog food and water, or hiding his keys in the garbage disposal.....
She gave me head because I gave her my pack of cigarettes...And you said quitting would be hard.
The liquor store manager told us to drink responsible as we checked out and we laughed to his face. Like we're buying karkov at noon, responsibility is out of the question
Like that time I held Annie up and she peed all over the window.. We make a good team.
You almost make it sound as if getting an education to further your career is more important than beer and tacos.
Maybe. This hangover is made of nightmares and that thing from the Alien movies.
Yo plow her in the living room were all outside tommy wants to see
where are you?
talk to ya later, gotta sled down these stairs real quick
Would I waste your time for mediocre porn?
TELL HER ABOUT THE GODDAMNED MOTHERFUCKING POTATOES
Last night I made out with two lesbians while dancing with another girl. I'm pretty sure it wasn't even real life.
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