You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
My cat gives me a boner
I picked my nose. Flicked it. I heard it hit something. Next thing I know, it's floating around in my wine glass.
I want to get so wasted that I make middle aged irish men look like mormon girls
Don't worry we will all be making bad decisions soon
That's the most comforting thing I've heard in months
You raged at the rock climbing place for not selling beer and then just said "fuck it" and pulled out a flask.
I hat to flip my "days since last bad decision" chart back to zero. So...yeah. Sigh.
I'm drunk in a place called Lick-A-Chick. PS. It's not a lesbian hot spot, they sell chicken.
speaking of festive, i made out with a guy in a leaf pile last night. happy fall?
Two things. 1) party at my house this Friday 2) what was the name of the Australian you fucked on the cruise ship?
The doctor said that if they accidentally damage my nerve endings I could permanently lose feeling in my lower jaw.. Honestly the first thing that came to mind was how that would affect my blowjob skills.
If it involves notarization or the Misfits, I am up to date. Anything else, I know fuck-all.
i sent him a picture of his friend's dick and told him he should really stop thinking he's my only option.
I'm intrigued by how his mouth tasted the same as his dick.
Well the grass always *looks* greener on the other side but sometimes that’s bc there’s a sewage runoff...
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