i now know how you feel when you have to walk me home. she ran into a streetlight and into garbage.
The walk of shame is far, far worse on crutches.
We woke up next to each other with a mutual look of disgust, and then he left. I knew I should have gone for the younger brother.
just bought a coffee grinder that advertiesed spacious grinding chamber...new nickname for my bedroom?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just used a coupon while buying plan B. The pregnant sales clerk nodded in approval.
I mean we've tried to get high on nutmeg, we clearly dont know the definition of "too far"
i get of class at 4. it takes me 17 minutes to walk home and 3 to load a bowl. thank you, priority registration.
Definitely just puked in this corn maze. Families are staring.
He purred while eating me out. HE PURRED AND I LIKED IT.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just consider it? What else do you have going on today that could be as awesome as a day full of lord of the rings and sex?
my vagina is starting to think like a penis, and I'm not even slightly worried
We will go to karaoke
Okay, well, i'm covered in paint, haven't showered & have already been drinking, so if I fall on the floor in a blaze of depeche mode & beer tears, you can't pretend you don't know me
You kept ranting how Captain Planet is getting shortchanged in the superhero department. Other than that you kept it together
I have a few Facebook friends I only keep around for quality control purposes on Tinder
I'm sorry you had to knock him out on your birthday. But that also means I won the bet that you'd hit someone so you owe me 40. dollars
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