So im pretty sure the object of my emotional onterest is tired of playing with me....
Ps there is totally a drug addled prostitute in olympic pizza asking for change for a 100 bill
I think dad's getting high again. His last google search was "awesome ping pong shit."
If you feel like laying around and watching a movie, that's where I'll be for the next several hours not moving, blaming others, and generally feeling sorry for myself.
When he goes down on me, he stares me in the eyes like a shark mocking it's prey as it devours it. Plus, his beard smells like dirty gym socks. This has got to end.
I'm using toast as a chaser. If I wasn't already so fucked up this would be revolting.
So I went to daintily fall onto my bed like I was in a hotel commercial and I completely missed my matress and landed on my floor. Just thought u should know.
I also turned off the Anchorman DVD start menu before cause I didn't want Will Ferrel watching me lose my virginity.
Today has been like a snow day for your boobs. No rules, just doing whatever they want.
Also CANADIAN LIPS TASTE OF MAPLE SYRUP AND APOLOGIES. SORRY.
I'm gonna tell the medical examiner that your cause of death was over-arousal.
That's how pantless uber rides happen
She's one of those people who could be either 16 or 23. In which case she's too old for me or in dangerously jailbait territory for you, bro.
So she was on top of my phone and somehow called my roommate while I banged her. I picked up and he congratulated me. I was with his sister. I will take this to my grave.
She played the piano. I played the piano. She got on top of the piano. I got on top of her.
Randomize
