Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
how can i incorporate a boy scout uniform into what i do tonight?
I've only left my bed to pee and eat nutella out of the jar with my fingers
Also I climbed atop a mailbox with a toilet paper hat and a wolverine claw made of glowsticks, screaming at passers-by that they were going to die. Control me
I feel like I owe it to them to wear pants.
I remember nothing of last night, but I did manage to figure out which frats I went to by the trails of straw across campus.
Thanks man, but unless some hot chick comes in to work with a case of beer and offers me a head job, I'm pretty much screwed for New Years
I don't know his last name, but he's in phone as Pat the conqueror.
Btw I'm already known as the drunk roommate. Don't know if that's a success or a failure seeing as it hasn't even been a week since I've been here
Well, I'm hung over and my penis hurts - two signs of success
Homophobes nationwide are huddled in their bunkers tonight and I can't stop giggling. Could be the wine.
CODE RED CODE RED MY VIBRATOR IS BROKEN THIS IS NOT A DRILL
His acid is intense dude. I was just over at his place laughing about the hole in the wall I was convinced was a cat
she's pretty fucking smug for someone who has had unprotected sex with a convicted felon
I wasn't talking about him I meant his penis! Its not a pet
Oh. Well it should be. I like petting it.
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