why didn't you poke me back
Far right against the wall..hiding come find me. dont tell oyhers hahaha
Saw 2 former students outside gas station. gave me money to buy 2 12 packs, asked if I wanted to go to their party.
I told them I had a gf and took one of the 12 packs. Come over.
Texas should really raise its teaching standards.
if your phone is working sorry i called you at 2am. if it is not then i never called your phone at 2am
i just found out that washing ur bong in the dishwasher works. its been a productive day
The worst part of it is that he's not the first man I've fucked with 2+ chihuahua's.
The Fresno prostitute seemed offended all I wanted from her was directions back to the freeway.
She just looked at him and said "I'm gonna fuck that" and it totally worked.
I woke up with flowers, a tiara & pasta salad in my bed. Tequila makes me act like a fat Disney princess
"I'm gonna wax that ass" was the successful pick up line used on me last night. Clearly I had a few too many cause it worked..
This guy smelled his armpits before trying to approach me at the bar
I can't hookup with a guy in my car because it smells like Taco Bell..
Also my bed has glitter in it for reasons I do not recall
When I told her I was deaf and took my hearing aids out at night to sleep, she said it must be nice not having to hear drunken roommates having awkward sex late at night.
My dad just informed me that I may be entitled to $1700 worth of stimulus money... looks like that hitachi is coming sooner than later. Let's hope for the best!
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