So random guy from last night came over tonight. I told myself I wasn't going to sleep with him but he had some killer dirty talk and a big penis in his arsenal...what was I supposed to do? Supposedly he lost his virginity to his wife and since their divorce a year ago I'm the 1st girl he's slept with, I feel like I just re-took his virginity...I feel like a rockstar.
we're doing shots for every degree below freezing it is outside
I find it ironic that im starting my birth control on mothers day.
shes still asleep dad put a lobster in her bathroom
I don't remember anything other than how good it felt when I peed my pants.
Vodka shot parachutes
Fucking utilizing a thrid story dorm room
Come down. Bring Jorts. We're getting ready for this tricycle race like champions.
Dude, I had no choice. I was defending my genitals.
if this uncomfortable exchange we're having is you trying to flirt with me i suggest you stop it before someone gets hurt
How bad is it I'm looking at his cock while waiting to see my therapist?
Hooked up with a guy dressed as Miss Frizzle last night... Asked if I could ride his Magic School Bus
I swear to god if you eat that last piece of pie while I'm gone I will never speak to you again. I'm so serious.
He asked me who my new boyfriend was and I showed him a picture of my sex toys.
Going to jail. Warrant. Be home late. For the love of god turn your ringer on.
I apparently ooze single. The second I left his house after break up sex five of my old booty calls text me
Randomize
