: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
Sarah, plain, and tall I adore you
Is there a nice way of saying 'touch my penis or i dont really wanna hangout"?
so we were having anal, both very very drunk when he started shouting his roomates name
drunk enough to think that masterbating in the pool is an awesome idea
The manager of the bar we were at the night before came to my house today giving me coupons. Apperently you and i won karaoke night which is a prize of 300 beer dollars. No idea what beer dollars means nor do i have any memory of doing karaoke but lets go back tonight.
Now that my 6 day bender is behind me, I just realized I might have been the one who took a shit in our mailbox that past few days.
It's taking 3 penises to fill the hole he left in my heart.
It's like god made him fantastic at oral to make up for what his mouth does the rest of the time.
I gave you a piece of bread to sober you up. You wiped your face off with it and then gave it back to me.
My chin is breaking out a bit and feels all itchy and burny like I'm allergic to something. Are you using a new lotion on your balls?
It might be whiskey, but I view Marge and Homer Simpson as something to strive for
Why is there a business card for people who need bail bonds in my wallet...
he invited me over. we listened to jazz, smoked weed, then cerebrally fucked each other over a three hour game of chess
He sounds like Chris Tucker and wants to eat me out when I’m on my period. If that isn’t love I don’t know what is.
Randomize
