Only a mothe r could love this liver
It's a pity Stephen Hawking can't do sarcasm.
i'm at the st pattys day thing. the bar is packed. they just put on celine dion its all coming back to me now. i'm screaming the words.
it's 1 pm.
I need to get my pants from under your porch. People are asking questions.
Is it bad that my only regret is fucking on the bathroom floor and not the sink?
DRUNK CANOEING
Please text me if you survive.
LAND HO BITCH
Lets just not get arrested. That might put a damper on everything. I only say that cause i've almost been arrested.
Are we still banned from the library?
Its everclear night, yall need carbs in your body!
I respect your roll as DD and there're am required to respect your vehicle
Dear Jesus. Send me strength to not suck cock this morning.
Maybe he injected his testicle?
hey u leave my anime porn out of this
They made me leave the maternity ward, how do I get back in?
Well, why would you bring gelado into a strip club?
Randomize
