Dont touch anything! You just got rid of your crabs!
Bar closing I am hiding in the bathroom. do you think anyone will find me?
Skinny jeans should not be made in size 14. Then, it's just a lie.
ugly people sure do ruin things
i am pregamming alone in my car. scale of 1-10 how alcoholic is that
im pretty sure thats an 11
Watching marley and me... this girls got me whipped man
we just watched the ball drop on the spanish channel. best mistake of my life.
You told him how lucky he was to be an elephant and kept trying to grab his "trunk"
not good my parents heard a big thud and found me passed out in the bathrrom abt an hr ago. hit my head arm and side. dont remember. real talk.
do we own a ladder
We do not.
then how am i on the roof
she just stared at nothing and then looked at me and goes, "that's a weird place to put the wall"
What's your ideal size in a man?
I just asked if you could cover my shift tomorrow......
I want him for more than banging and buying me potato salad. Is this what love feels like?
Because you put the dick in ridiculously amazing boyfriend. And you deserve to have nice things happen to your penis. That's why.
Your ex spoke highly of your penis and it’s skill. I’m interested in learning more about it ;-)
Randomize