why is every porn film shot in the same house? with the same red couch!?!
Don't you hate it when all three people suddenly sober up in the middle of a threesome. Awwwwkward.
2 showers later and I'm still finding cum on random body parts of mine
I never had a problem I couldn't slut my way out of.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I knew it was gonna be a rough night when the guys next to us at Relay for Life started shot gunning beers and yelling "This ones for all the hot chicks that went bald because of cancer". It kinda went downhill from there....
Also he wants to know a casual, consise way to ask a girl in a bar if he could eat her out. Think on that.
I just karate chopped a humming bird out of mid air. It came at my face while I was out side smoking. Scared the shit out of me. My ninja skills just took over. Haha. I mean really at that point it was me or him.
When asked if they had been introduced, Damo said "No but I know we've pretty much fucked all the same girls in town"
We were talking when all of a sudden she reach and started squeezing my dick and goes "nice." and then just kept the conversation going like nothing happened.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
literally just blacked in. Im watching what to expect when your expecting, eating pretzels and peanut butter, and I have someone's underwear around my neck.
A few days ago I apparently came up, asked her to make me soup, and handed her a can of coconut milk.
I just had the worst experience of my life, my grandma found my condoms.
I almost died in that meeting. Nearly dried up and blew away in the pure powder form of boredom
I know that feel bro
Then you guys just all showered together...?
And here I am, playing fetch with my cat at two in the morning.
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