Come with me and I'll find you a girl. What's your type?
Vagina
new hobby: convincing random sorority girls around campus that we hooked up last weekend. i'm 2 for 5.
for real. he might as well bring dogs if they're lower than a 7.
i don't really know how much tequila is too much
I just found out that the liquid capacity of my breasts is 700ml each. I should not be left alone at home when drunk.
After we smoked, the cops questioned us but i just asked if he wanted to join our basketball team.
it's graduation. he's gonna get congratulations slash emotional i cant believe youre leaving me sex.
It's almost like a boob-text, but it's not. Because it was live. And you were showing a bunch of people.
We play this game where we catch up on what we missed over five years of not talking to eachother, then we have sex like nothing ever happened.
it's all fun and games til I text you in last nights clothes with a head bleed
Do me a favor and don't mention him I feel like Regina George and I just want to scream I made him
Sex was great. Left his house while he was asleep but on the plus side I was able to get gas station food.
Just stalked the girl I hooked up with last night's boyfriend. He seems nice, I approve.
He called my IUD an IED, and said that’s why I had bomb pussy.... I didn’t correct him
After everything I’ve done… had sex with people off tinder, gone to clubs and bars, gone to hockey games…. I get Covid at GRANDMAS HOUSE
Randomize
