I'm kindof freaked out about my cock not getting up this morning. Cove over later so I can sort this out. Do not post this on texts from last night.
Damn that would have been a great one. Hahah and don't worry...
My aunt just said- "pizza is like sex. Even if it ain't good it ain't bad." Obviously she doesn't know us too well.
i am positive it's ok to drink. it's just pieces of the plastic knife i forgot was in the blender.
Still bad at ganbling. Still good at dringing.
She had her laptop open and there was microsoft word opend and all was written was "no italianoo"
A kind stripper put a blanket over me last night
They're re-releasing Titanic in 3-D. Can I interest you in a joint venture to create the greatest drinking game of all time? I think yes
attractive or not, he has more than one book on serial killers. i'm gonna get out of here while i can
I took the weekend off because he and I were supposed to go to Vegas for our anniversary and get a hooker remember?
Ah, yes. Who says romance is dead?
Four times in one night? That Energizer bunny outfit lived up to the hype.
We laughed. We cried. We came everywhere.
When you wear a dress that resembles the shape and color of Kirby to a wedding, you get the attention you deserve.
This is why I can't take dates to shows... I've literally made out with everyone in this band. And two of the guys in the crowd. And the bartender.
she brought her phone charger to the bar this bitch is ready to drink
I got eaten out in the igloo at snow-kings castle last night.My thighs were literally melting ruts in the ice bench.Definitely colder than the minus 40 blowjob at Desiree's wedding
Randomize
