I'm gonna answer everything she says with 'cum on da face' until she breaks up with me...great idea or greatest idea?
I just want a better ending for myself. Not walking around with one sock on and my bush hanging out.
I woke up to his little sister feeling me up. I guess it's time to meet the family.
I know its been a few months but you must know you hve the 2nd biggest dick I've ever seen. 1st place went to a rapper so don't feel bad.
He pocket texted me while I was blowing him in the car...What are the odds?
Considering how often you blow him,high.
maybe volvos are so family friendly and safe because they're extremely uncomfortable to get fucked on.
My reasons for going are selfish. She just opened her own law firm. I figure having a lawyer as a friend is a good idea. Nothing in my life suggests I won't need a lawyer again.
Shit ive learned: when going out to a party, always wear a bathing suit underneath just in case theres a pool with a roof next to it
Here's how he asked the pregnant girl for a cigarette. Hey yo prego throw me a square. Not joking.
I'm auditing financial statements and ur growing weed this is bullshit how did this happen to me
Oh I was gonna ask you the same thing...? It's official ask anyone to see your husbands dick day.
I fucked my ex boyfriend to get shrooms for you guys
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
...I watched him run on the beach yesterday and I think I started ovulating
No, Ethan, handcuffs and friendship bracelets are not "basically" the same thing.
idk what the male equivelent of vajazzling is but it better be worth the time
Randomize