How can she be afraid to give you a blowjob? It's not like your penis is going to turn on her and eat her.
Be careful down there, Shane may have pooped on the carpet.
you went to subway and got pissed when they refused to deep fry your sub
Talking to this girl is like playing minesweeper on hard. There's red flags everywhere.
I'm not a pervert.. I just like to be naked...
Today's dinner table topic: the probablity of my dad turning gay if he ever left my mom.
I don't know where I am and I feel like a hippo shat in my mouth. This sofa is comfy though.
I am the worst sexter. i actually told him .. if i had a penis, it would be hard right now. BTW thats a turn off.
He referred to his penis as "a gentle giant" and said I had offended it
Sometimes things go your way and sometimes you get hit on by a fat drunk girl.
I AM CRUING IT IS 93:2 AM AND I AM CYGIN INT BED
AMERICA LOVES YOU. RIDE THAT DICK LIKE PAUL REVERE RODE HIS HORSE SO MANY YEARS AGO
Btw...refried beans is a terrible thing to throw up.
What do I do with all this pork broth? I can't waste it.
CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG
Hey! you should come over!
Who is this? The number is saved as "Sexy Awesome"
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