I just woke up in bed next to my teacher. Does that mean I'm passing now?
Why did you send me a picture of a dick?
It was an accident sry. Not mine tho.
I must say, I don't like the act of throwing up, but the feeling after is quite delightful
It's just good to know that when I drink like a twenty year old I still act like one.
She acts like a 3 year old but with fantastic tits. This girl is the reason women are objectified
She sat next to me on the couch and said "word going around is you got a sweet cock". My nickname problem was solved!
I remember him going "OH SHIT" when he saw you straddling me on the table. And it was like the best feeling ever.
You got a write up and a first aid award all in the same night. The don was impressed!
Just want to let you know thanks for setting the bar pretty low when it comes to girls.
I have a black eye again and dont know why again
I have loved her ever since she went down on my first wife
Let it be known that on this day, the 26th of October, in the year 2016, I successfully put both of his balls in my mouth at once.
He was gone for 5 minutes, opened the car door and said, "Don't eat my shit." and dropped Chipotle on the passenger seat. He was gone for another 10 minutes and came back with Coldstone. That stoned.
I just got a hug from a random kid in my class. he said I was a champ at the bar last night..someone help me.
I just made out with his twin, technically it's the same person..... Right?
Randomize
