Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
Liz and I are now offficially highest. OH, and your girlfriend may be a vampire. Heads up. SPARKLESSSSS
Put my glitter back.
Picking up third year law school girls is like MILF hunting for beginners
look up what dreaming that you're in a lesbian relationship with a manatee means.
not good my parents heard a big thud and found me passed out in the bathrrom abt an hr ago. hit my head arm and side. dont remember. real talk.
if i got ashes i think they'd burn a hole into my head with the amount of sins i've committed this year alone and it's only february
She's a freaking stalker dude, it's like having some kind of cartoon animal just following around everywhere
he looks SO much like Drake, I feel like an extreme groupie every time we have sex.
I watched her follow him out of the bar, chase him around the corner and literally throat punch him. It was awesome.
If by "Are you drunk?" you mean "Did you just faceplant in the checkout line at Target?" the answer is yes.
Yah... You need to get here. Evan just peed off the karaoke stage.
I apologize in advance for the number of sex toys drying on the bathroom sink.
He told me he loved me...but added "you crazy bitch" at the end. Does it still count???
he said he's going to burn things and pack his stuff. he may leave tomorrow supposedly but i doubt it
The pandemic has not made Uber drivers any less chatty.
Randomize