i cant decide if i should go fuck j*** or keep watching real genius
WIFE SWAP. FAMILY OF MIDGETS. LIFETIME. NOW.
Just found the video that explains the neighborhood applause. Your landlord is awesome, and the clothes are on the roof
Just got an email from TMobile. Said they were going to pursue "more qualified" candidates. So this is what rock bottom feels like.
and this is why we should make december sharting awareness month.
Okay, we really need to start training for the St Pattys parade. 48 hours of green beer won't end well if we don't prep ourselves. 2 week bender starts now
This is going to be another afternoon spent getting drunk in the shower, isn't it?
Although, I did get to see a Raiders fan and his toothless girlfriend get roughed up by the police and dragged out of the stadium. So the night wasn't a total loss.
during charades she pointed to herself and you guessed 'girl who wants to fuck me'
My brother is wearing glitter eyeshadow and split leg skinny jeans
You've been usurped as King of the Gays
I don't mean to insult you, but did you leave your training bra in my bedroom last night?
You were all "think outside the box, inside the bag!" as you filled your camelback with beer.
Yes. That was the exact moment of my conscience clicking into instant high alert.
Handcuffs. Recoverd. I'm a goddamn detective.
Damn victory sex feels great
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