Who did Billy Mays play for?
Yeah. I hotboxed a windbreaker.
I hate myself for knowing the words to party in the USA.
What. The. Fuck. No, you will not spank me.
That wasn't intended for you, my bad.
You unbuttoned your shirt and started walking down the center of the road screaming traffic stops for Enrique Iglesias.
omg i met someone at the bar who sells hair feathers. that are long. saved in my phone as "haiirs deather"
I inadvertently smoked 6 blunts at one time. We just kept passing them around...I didn't know what happened until it was over. I can't walk.
I don't understand why you aren't on this trip all I do is smoke weed drink beer and get fingered
I just really don't even know what I would do with a boyfriend... Like do I just kiss it and then leave it in the corner? Like how often does it eat??
Pretty sure my boner drove me home. Like it didn't just do the steering it was the gas and brake too..
The annual Father's Day Wake and Bake has been canceled due to lack of hustle.
My heart wants him and my vagina wants him...to have a bigger dick.
AND I woke up to eggs in my bra. Thanks Taco Cabana...
There’s nothing that says motivation more than watching these little geniuses on Kids Baking Championship New Year’s Day. I’m ready to fuck shit up this year.
yes that’s a photo of a horny gay donkey
Oh I know. I’ve known many horny gay donkeys in my time.
Randomize
