I'm gonna cuddle the shit out of you tomorrow
You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
see... this is why i put birth control in all my friends drinks
wait.... you do what?
I was getting a bj with sports center on in the background
Da na na, na na naa
21 Porn Stars Confess What Sex Is Really Like On Set
we got so high we spray painted his girlfriend's UGG boots. she's CRYING. it's hysterical.
He saw my tits then looked up and yelled thank you jesus as loud as he could
I threw up red last night... I wanted to pinch myself because it wasn't green.
did i paint my nails blue or do i need to make a trip to the ER?
It's like the last supper of drinking before the summer ends
19 People That Found Pubes In All The Wrong Places
Change of plans I'm coming home and shotgunning all the beer we have.
Question: would Brian be pissed if I brought his 17 year old sister as my date to the wedding?
I'm sitting on the toilet just to avoid my bosses look of disapproval
Good morning love! Friendly reminder that we decided to make leggings with a vagina zipper. "For the winter quickie"
So... How much of our rent is drug money?
How do you politely tell someone to get out of your house in Russian