I wanna wear you like a flannel shirt
TRUE LIFE: my roommate is growing a bush.
better yet, TRUE LIFE: my roommates boyfriend begged her to grow a bush.
I think I'm going to inject the gummy vitamins with vodka
I'm glad you're using your medical degree for some good for once
No stds, not pregs, and lost two pounds. I'd call that a successful two years of grad school.
I didn't wanna be that girl that took a shit in the ocean..
She went into the basement and sang to my cat for three hours....she actually has a beautiful voice....
He honestly told me my belt was "supercute" when we started hooking up. I would be the girl to find the only straight man in the world that uses the word "supercute".
The twins are whispering in turkish together. I think I did something bad last night.
Just got invited out of group to take shots after hearing her gay friend say "why would I give him my alcohol so you can suck his dick. It's going to be a good night
Watching the tv in the reflection of my phone cause I'm too hungover to roll over.... Yes it is 4 PM...
I was worried he'd break you after the hiatus your lady parts had to take from social interaction.
Well, I have a text in my phone that just says "Scrumtrelescent" from a girl I have in here as "Cheesy Tits", so you figure out how my night was going.
Currently on my Sunday walk of shame. Should I go to church?
I'm drinking apple juice and champagne while watching crossroads..like the classy bitch that i am.
And how about the fact that the first time i really truly looked at a guy's dick was in my car. MY CAR. GODDAMNIT!!!
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