We found an eightball on the ground last night. I mean, really, who does that?
he was actually really polite. he asked before he came on my chest because he "wasn't sure my stance on it".
If I don't throw up the day I graduate i'll feel like the last 4 years and thousands of dollars spent on alcohol will have been wasted.
The more and more I drink I keep rationalizing banging eye patch girl
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I found you laying in the kitchen with a bottle of vodka and a slice of bologna on your face. You said you were having a spa day.
Dude, just be careful. Her invitation for BJ is just a trap for her to stick her finger up your ass.
There should be a rule. If your dick is under 6 inches, you are not allowed to dress as Thor.
I kind of want to throw a lot of things at him. Mostly blunt, heavy objects.
I had a dream about a vibrator with 42 different settings. If that's not a good indication I need to get laid, I don't know what is
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just discovered i ordered the nhl center ice package back in september, the operator said there was a note next to the time I called, indicating I may have been intoxicated while calling (no clue why but it was noted)...meaning I was drunk...meaning ill never miss another sabres game...i love me and am beaming with self pride
I SHITYOUNOT DAN JUST PUNCHED A DEER IN THE FACE. MID LEAP.
I just tried to order ice cream on my bagel. I think I should just call it
The nun costume is coming back hard and it still has glitter and the smell of Vegas on it.
Best. Text. Ever.
I dare you to find another dealer that delivers bud to your home along with deep fried vegan burritos
I want to be a supportive friend to her, but I also want to sleep with her ex now that he's single.
Randomize