there hasn't been a girl guy ratio this good since a guy jumped on one of the Titanic life rafts
I am at a bar watching a rat tail get braided.
I actually had no interest in him until he started talking about his 4 arrests. That made him go from a 5 1/2 to a 8, easily.
He kept yelling "osteoporosis" and threw milk at her because she broke her arm.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't remember you taking the condom off last night. Did you just walk home in it ?
Ugh. This is the type of hangover that all other hangovers want to grow up to be.
I masterbate to the thought of you. You totally aren't just a booty call.
By the way I got my period today. No NHL babies for me.
He came in two seconds and stole my pizza so I'm not counting it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well, we ended up labeling the relationship. We are now each other's designated butt-toucher.
I just did a walk of shame on my own block. one of the old neighbors saw and greeted me "good morning, girl next door"
So yeah, my old kindergarten teacher just asked me who gave me the hickies on me neck.
I hate being on my period . Did you know that by the time I'm 30 I would've wasted 1,176 days of my life I could've had sex but couldn't bc I was on my period.
I am in the parking lot of CVS in Auburn. I think a truck full of Plan B and regret just arrived.
I'm eating an ice cream cone and pooping. Don't know how I'm gonna wipe.
Randomize