? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
I then asked the hardee's employee: mam, do you mind if i pay 75 cents in cash and then put the 1.13 on my debit card.
the women in the ladies room did not appreciate my innovation of turning a sink into a urinal
Somewhere during foreplay he said something about me only being with two other guys... I just went with it cause we have never had that conversation...
I will fight anything that is not spinning right now
onest when I told you I'm a paramedic but I'm also a stripper.
I don't like him near enough to give up day drinking AND my prostitute costume
I don't think she can come out, she went too hard in the Intro to Theater Drinking Game at 2:30
We fed him just...so many bright colored crayons when he was blacked out. I hope he looks at his shits because this could be all for nothing
I told you alcohol was flammable, but you didn't believe me until you tried to extinguish your sparkler by submerging it in vodka and the bottle burst into flames.
Final Summary: could he eat a lit sparkler? Probably. Could he do it while peeing off the roof? I'll tell you when you get to the ER.
He won't have sex to beyonce. I hate him.
Like I fucked him in the shower at 3 am when I had classes all day the next day so he can't say I'm not dedicated
I literally have a pirate chest of slutty clothing.
I hate when he takes the condom off to cum all over me. It defeats the purpose.
It’s like having a barf bag and choosing to puke in your own lap.
Randomize