If I would have known that wiping my dick on her pillow would have caused her to leave........
so i'm sitting in his room drinking tequila from the bottle and watching harry potter. he's jacking off to some porn a couple feet away from me. at one point i look over and see that he's watching me instead of the porn. please help me figure out how warped it is that i found that romantic
something must definitely be wrong with me if i'm chasing after a guy who cant even get it up
If Bret Micheals dies..will VH1 have to go off the air?
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I'm not sure if what i'm hearing downstairs is sex or not, but if it is, it sounds like there's a dog involved...i'm mildly concerned.
he squeezed my boobs like he didn't know what else to do with them, then turned down head...
told you he was gay.
you kept going on about how you couldnt haven been the one throwing up because you were peeing in circles.
I just discovered the Reese's pieces and sourdough bread sandwich. No signs of coming down.
WERE YOU GOING TO TELL ME THERE WAS A LOAF OF BANANA BREAD IN THE OVEN BEFORE YOU LEFT FOR A 5 HOUR SHIFT??
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sweet and genuine is kinda lame. I'm more of a bust all over your face and hair kinda guy.
Uhm the hair is off limits bro, conditioner can only go so far.
Bro? You just made it a target.
I projectile vomited in his sisters room where the toiled would have been if it were the bathroom.
When I ask you to make sure no ones coming while I'm changing.. The logical friend would keep watch. But you my, best friend come stand in front of me and flash everybody.
How was the party? Lets put it this way: "He wants her dick" was a factual sentence stated last night.
I threw up in bed last night and tried cleaning it with oldspice and baby powder
At 3:00am my whole house started smelling like cooking meat. I have no idea why she thought it was a good idea to crock-pot a WHOLE turkey that early in the morning.
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