Moving to Utah. Got sick of alcohol and have a severe wife shortage.
WAKE UP. GET ME THE PILL. AND SAVE MY LIFE
I need a legitimate reason as to why the microwave door is in the shower
they named it eva bongoria. i had to hit it based on the name alone.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sounds good. I will just get tanked here and wear this batman mask.
Does taking an old homeless guy to the strip club, buying him lap dances, and calling him pops all night count as a good deed???
dude, we need a reunion soon, my vagina needs a deep massage. The kitty is ready to play
I woke up with his condom in my mouth. I actually use them now you should be proud of me.
I started dipping tositos in my screwdriver last night
then apparently I went "not bad" and continued
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I found out Naomi Campbell and I have the same birthday and I feel like that explains so much
Nothing says male bonding like watching porn with your grandpa
And I'm bringing my coffee cup of wine.
What's the rule for getting in fights with homeless men in suits?
Here's a rule: don't
Is it bad when I wake up sore & don't know if my injuries are from sex or the mechanical bull at the bar?
That’s the third time this month he’s hooked up with a girl by telling her it’s his bachelor party, and he’s not even dating a chick let alone engaged.
Randomize