So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
Just saw a squirrel crossing the road in a crosswalk..my morning has improved exponentially.
Wish you were here....
And I wish your mouth was around my cock, but that never happens, does it?
The frequency that you give me blue balls couldn't be healthy.
It's like there testing me. My dad kept handing me margaritas and saying "you can take it"
You two were too busy to notice that his used condom landed on me when he threw it.. Thanks.
I am literally missing a chunk of eyelashes. That's how fun it was.
I drank entirely too much. My skin hurts to wear
Some drunk guy thought my knee scooter was the sexiest thing he's ever seen. He then proceeded to ask me about duck hunting and decoys...
I found a half composed text to you this morning and all it said was HELP M. Is that how I ended up at the bottom of the stairwell in only a tee-shirt and one heel?
considering I never received the text I would go with 'yes'.
Now the circle is complete. Just interviewed a guy who was a higher up member of the team I worked for in my job before this place
Kick open the door, strike a pose, steal a boyfriend, end scene.
I just woke up in the closet wearing nothing but a Santa hat.
Just rode a bull topless for a free bar tap for a month
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
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