i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
I hate when you've made an ugly girl's day by having sex with her, and then she gets greedy and wants to cuddle after you cum.
It is virtually impossible to listen to single ladies and perform any seated task.
Also pencil in smooth jazz and illegal activities. The usual.
he yelled at me for calling the fat girl fat. if I can't call out fat girls to my brother who do i have?
In the ER. 2nd degree burns. Drunken attempt to make gasoline scented candles.
Passive mediator is your role in this relationship. My role is dick punching arsonist
I got stood up on a date. They are singing "dancing with myself" on karaoke in my honor.
Are some dicks heavier than others? Random question as I'm feeling mine.
He called himself Jesus all night but I'm not sure if that's his real name or not
If the sex wasn't incredible why would I compare it to cheesy tots
Are you jealous of my sweatsuit? It's how I get men on Tinder.
I am texting my fuck buddy about fucking tonight, while facebook chatting with his wife about food.
I want a musical about memes.
Showed up to pick her up in my boxers. Lets just say im 2 for 2 with this new idea
Randomize
