In all seriousness though I just found out the dog pissed in my bed it'd be nice to crash somewhere other than my couch while my piss soaked bedding is in the washer
i just puked in front of my entire floor a girl on crutches asked iof i needed help hahaaa fuck ima damn fool
I texted him about a book we both like. I was expecting a "ya great book... let's bone" response. It didn't work
I just saw a girl wearing a flannel shirt that would make 1992 cringe
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So she is eating her margarita with tortilla chips....like using her chip as a spoon
Halloween 2010: the NuvaRing girls. You're Thursday. We'll walk into the party chanting "Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday, Everydaaay".
She finally woke up and said, "Me- nothing, potato peeler- 1." And rolled back over.
So many bounce houses so little time
You opened a bottle of wine with a shoe and a wall last night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
sitting in the kitchen naked and eating stirfry, random dude left my room saying thanks and gave me a bottle of wine. explain...
No it was fine, I've just never seen that many people eat dog food
Just checking to make sure you weren't kidnapped, pregnant or watching Fox News.
Hiking for a first date sounded like a good idea in theory because there was absolutely no possibility of me blacking out. In practice, I'd rather black out than go through what I just went through.
Should we make a shared Google doc list of places we want to fuck? Like a scavenger hunt?
hey if my parents say thanks for the meatballs just go with it ill explain later
Randomize