Just found 50 pesos and a coke spoon in my dads old shit. Gotta love the 70s
Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
After last night's events, I googled "how to change your life direction." I found a really helpful ehow.com article.
and when i screamed you came in my eye, i found out that everyone else in the room had only pretneded to be sleeping
And i generally try not to roofie people when I'm in a committed relationship.
If I wake up with an unknown penis in me one more time I am literally going to press charges to the makers of tequila.
Is it mean to convince my old booty call she used me for sex so I can bang her again before I leave for Denver?
Sweet. I'm actually coaching my work study into a 4-girl orgy so dinner was kinda important. Yes, I'm the best boss ever.
Sex last night was mind blowing. your wife is one lucky lady.
Dude I'm at a bar, and there's this Elvis impersonator here that I went to rehab with. Apparently Elvis has left the wagon.
I really want some funfetti cake but I feel like its more socially acceptable to go out and drink
No. DON'T DO IT. Friends don't let friends fuck clowns.
Hahaha perfect. Let's start stopping drinking tomorrow
I think I'm just gonna exercise my lungs and fingers. With bong hits and crochet. BECAUSE I AM A REAPONSIBLE ADULT DAMMIT!!
I may have dislocated my hip getting fucked on the bathroom counter
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