Why does lindsey know I was naked in the kitchen?
i just walked into thanksgiving and three people in a row asked me who i was. really?
His internet history had "Disney Porn" on it.
You going to midnight mass? we need a dd
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
ironically, his detergent was also "small and mighty"
I sent him a pic of my tits.. All he said was, "oh your sun burn"
Only you could be admitted to the ER and walk out with a nurse's phone number. I wish I was gay
We got really high and decided it would be a good idea to wash towels in the dishwasher. I left before I could see the final result.
If i ever start ordering tequila again please tackle me to the ground and steal my wallet
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i think i have weasels eating my brain. Also there is a skeleton staring at me from the back of the bathroom door. it's an awkward vomit. come find me please
I just remembered that I did shots out of a gay mans crotch. And there's someone saved in my phone as "Miranda knows where my car is"
Oh my god I peed in a park last night and then tried to set off fireworks with a group of middle-aged men
He was my first. He knew. He knew right there I was wrapped around his penis.
I'm with the cops, Trish's gay husband stabbed himself and is framing her for attempt of murder and I'm dressed 4 the club I'm wearing leather pants leather jacket leather boots and black club top. Embarrassed
Trying to decide if I'm relieved or disappointed that I didn't receive any fuck boi calls on nye
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