I wish they made sweatshirts for legs
you mean pants?
Good ideas don't start with we have a bottle of vodka..
he just looked at me and whispered "these are my sea lions. my sea lions." and then went back to licking the mirror
Just threw up at the bar from the heat. Fun change of pace.
and being hungover still at 4 in the afternoon is NOT "having allergies"
I'm making you a bingo card for hookups of the school year 2011-12 so you can make even worse life decisions next year
You're the only true friend I have, if true friendship is based off who would be there for me at 4am during a boxed wine crisis.
I got carried to one bar. Got a piggy back ride to the next bar. I was just testing our drinking team for st pattys day to make sure they are able to handle me more drunk than that.
Going through my purse trying to find money for this cab but all I keep pulling out if chicken from my burrito o ate an hour ago. Help?
I just saw a douchebag with frosted tips & a LaCoste polo with popped collar driving a Call of Duty edition Jeep. It was a cavalcade of stereotypes.
he drank all my beer while i was at work and passed out on my couch, when i got home he was out cold and my room mates pig was licking him. they seemed peaceful, so i took 20 bucks from his wallet and left again.
Thats just a parental red flag. They have been brainwashed. Lets baptize them into the church of PBR
He listens to me complain and in return I send him naked pictures. It's a win win situation
I woke up using a beer can as a pillow. successful party?
I can't take 'get a man' advice from you. You'll stick your penis in a warm banana peel.
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