If it makes you feel better, you're better at taking it in than ass than she is...
Well...yeah actually, that does make me feel better
i just assumed he broke up with her because she wasn't a freshman anymore
i just woke up at 8pm naked in my bed, with a fresh haircut. I wonder what barber i went to.
I should start riding the bus again so I can drink all day
If people don't want my drunken phone call then TAKE YOUR FUCKING NUMER OFF OF FACEBOOK, like it's just that easy...
I don't know what possessed you to do that, but you have to give the stripper more money before you try to check her oil or they are going to throw us out every time you do that.
I took shrooms last night.. For a good half hour I genuinely believed I was black and being held captive by a leaf. Never again.
We need to figure out what we are doing for halloween asap. I'm not going out like a punk ass bitch burger king again this year.
He was dressed as the 420 Easter bunny...he looked like a walking anti-drug campaign.
That moment when a stripper is the one that makes the two of you have to define the status of your relationship...
Yeah man, you were grinding with his wife, I wouldn't be worried about it
She's hot and all. It's just I don't want to become Eskimo brothers with my sister
That's okay I'm failing college because I'm to busy giving over the pant handjobs in class..
i just used your hair clip to unclog my bong. i miss you so much!
Well, fuck this election. I'm getting drunk, regardless of who wins.
Randomize
