whos cum tastes better, a guy who drinks apple juice or cranberry juice?
His fingers had 12 years of piano lessons behind them. my ex has been put to shame by a finger
I found a horn on the street but it's okay I disinfected it with vodka
why didn't you tell me his penis tasted like oreos?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sweetie, don't go home with him. You can do so much better. Everyone else at the bar agrees.
3 things. 1) we need alcohol 2) we need alcohol 3) we need tortilla chips. Let's make a plan. Bro shakes and salsa.
when im done with her im going to need you to carry me on your shoulders as i poses victoriously for all those who were within earshot
Please never let me the drunk fat dancer in the bus girl
well considering the guy who just delivered my cookies had to console me as i had a mental breakdown in front of him i'd say i'm 4/10 right now, thank you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
as much as I don't like snorting drugs, I would totally be fine with someone doing a line off my ass. that's just a whole new up
Doing coke by yourself isn't as fun. Even when you're watching a James Franco movie.
Its like my group of friends and I are all dating and we're all just a bunch of Swingers, is that normal?
I didn't really understand how big 10 inches is. Now I know.
Hey mike is locked out, sleeping on the common room couch, no idea where his pants are nor does he know where he is. When you get this let him in? And let me know ur alive too!
She put her coat on went to leave and called me an asshole. I responded with "I never said I wasn't" and then she pounced on me like a cat on cat nip.
Randomize