She even gives head with a lisp.
Do you recall us playing flip cup on your head?
Its all fun and games until someone grabs the electrical fence.
I'm not wearing underwear, I started my period this morning, and it's super windy. Recipe for disaster?
I really gotta be careful. My email inbox is equal parts notifications from instructors and this dude's dick. If I get drunk and reply to the wrong thing I might get kicked out of grad school.
Me focusing on not shitting my pants is keeping me awake.
He said "I can't wait for you to feel me inside of you so I can tell you gently that you're mine" and left me a 4 minute voice mail of him crying after I told him I didn't want to be with him. 30 year olds are off limits.
I don't know if your celebrity crush has ever asked you for nudes, but it's fucking awesome
Dude, you were tagged in a stripper FB selfie. That is a whole new level of something.....
You yelled This cop is arresting me for possession! Possession of MARIJUANA!!", everyone cheered, and you let him handcuff you and take you away.
Running my fingers through my hair is like that scene from Patch Adams where the girl goes swimming in a pool of spaghetti. I love molly.
You know Sunday Funday was a success when 'puke and rally' came at lunchtime on Monday.
Shriek
I don't know how a coffee date turned into road head. But hey
its like my accent is a device for a 100% chance of sex every time i leave the apartment. i love being english in this country.
Just let me put on a bra and brush the alcohol out of my hair.
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