Finally jerked of with a banana peel.
I think he liked me better when I only opened my mouth to suck his dick.
my purse only fit my wallet or the martini shaker. it wasnt even a question of which i was bringing.
i dodnt think we hooked up bcause he actually texted me the next day
She narrowed it down to 7 guys that could have gotten her pregnant.
I thinking of taking all of the pics of his dick that he's sent me and making a calendar.
I think that the winner of this years fantasy football league should get naming rights to you child
red lips, whiskey sips, shaking hips, nipple slips. my life as a rap song.
The first thing we did this morning was see if we could see her barf in the prking lot from the roof. We could. It was in 5 spaces.
All I remember is receiving a lap dance to slow motion.
Hey kevin, it's Ashlee. I have been trying to get ahold of you. Your pledge gave me your number. I really wanted to apologize for shitting in your car I'll buy new upholstery or pay to have it shampooed if needed. I'm so embarrassed.
Woo is fucking right, dude. Vodka night tonight. Honestly, every night pretty much seeems like vodka night lately. My liver wants to move out of my body like I gave it an eviction notice.
He played with my nipples while singing "How great thou art"
No we didn't talk. I was high and doing naked yoga in the living room when she walked in so it was just awkward. I didn't even know my dad had a girlfriend.
You really need to stop getting injured so often it's really starting to negatively impact my sex life. Oh and get well soon. . . no seriously though hurry the fuck up.
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