she was talking to me but i could help but stare at the extremely long hairs on her boobs. then she says, "your looking at the hair on my boobs aren't you"
Two people in the coffee shop I'm at are on a date and talking about how acid has affected them and the girl just mentioned meth. Fuck studying, this just got interesting.
She tried to lure me back to her house by saying she had "real" pizza.
i'm surprised you didn't wake up. like i literally came when he was fingering me as i was spooning with you and all you did was mumble "that's a good idea, mom" and pull the sheets away from me.
I love that my brother has just convinced my dad that smoking a blunt it an "unspoken family tradition"
He ripped off his shirt and tried to give me CPR. That damn bong.
what the fuck is a social media consultant, who does she consult for, and how bad is she at it? her facebook account is currently hacked and posting ads for the ipad 2 on my newsfeed
threw up outside of the dorms in the parking lot in the pouring rain on the first day of class, i'd say summer is off to a good start.
At one point during xmas dinner my whole family was double fisting. It was like thats how I learned to drink moment
my brain is opting to stay half drunk rather than relearn how to think. the rest of me is in no position to argue.
Got home to the hotel 3hrs ago per texts sent not in english to not a full phone number
How do you tell a woman that you are seeing that the scars on your back are from her awesome-in-bed little sister?
I have no concept of chastity or moderation, she is a Catholic guilt poster child, how could I not try to hit that
Note to self: Calvin Klein's are not safe to shit in.
My diet fell off the wagon when I began texting the pizza delivery guy my location on frat row.
Randomize