Well, she's an atheist who is addicted to the Sims.
Who isn't?
I don't care how bad it tastes, i just put it in my mouth and deal with it
Thats the last thing I remember and then I woke up in this Dutch kids dorm and he was taking a picture of me while I was sleeping
I just got cash back from buying a pregnancy test so that I can buy a case of joose. My life is in shambles.
Got home. Hugged Mom. The look on her face indicated she noticed nipple rings.
I JUST MET THE GIANT MAN THAT WILL CARRY ME FROM PLACE TO PLACE
thats why a responsible adult always keeps some facial hair just in case they need to shave a hulk hogan mustache for midget wrestling...
Did i tell you my idea for my life plan? Not the one that involves stripping.
If you can't drink with the big boys, give up your beer and go back to the playpen
Welp... sober this am and I still have a parrot.
Cancelling your gym membership calls for alcohol.
His truck was very sexy. Unfortunately, shortly thereafter, I discovered that the whole overcompensating thing is very true...
It is NEVER not funny to me when I am sitting at a table and I've touched the dicks of every single person I'm sitting with.
Is it bad that I'm not at all bothered by the fact that to some people I'm simply known as the girl that takes her shirt off?
She's not allowed to do acid anymore... she started crying because she thought she was an eagle.
Randomize