Odds of those being real?
One in who gives a fuck
Trying to find something to do here is like trying to find a vegan resturant in alabama.
under NO circumstances is it acceptable to fist pump to taylor swift
He tried to write down the address for the cab on half a bagel.
Imagine that my comprehension level is that of a 7 year old and explain your plan again
The more I stare at her and block out what she's actually saying with thoughts of what she could be saying, the more interested I become
apparently we spent 30 minutes inside that big Nike store turning all of their Duke gear inside out. for some reason the employees didn't stop us.
And my cat won't make me food. She's a bitch
I gotta figure out which 7 tampons in the box contains the drugs
I WISH WE COULD PLAY THE DRINKING GAME TOGETHER AND THEN BANG FOR AMERICA.
And THIS is why we get drunk. No good story, documentation, or event happens by eating a salad. Alcohol consumption leads to good things
Btw when I was saying "fuck you" I meant it like "be quiet beautiful princess"
we talked about the guy being eaten by the anaconda.. Then I proceeded to blow him
Just had a flashback of scottish man yellin' at my face. What the fuck I did?
Plan before tomorrows interview: wash off green glitter from EVERYWHERE!!!
Randomize
