just woke up. wallet empty. bottle empty. tattoo in pen on my arm. smell like bad sex. woke up alone. and wall-e is playing on my computer. need answers.
there needs to be a build-a-bong store...
just smoked a blunt while listening to nsync. i now know what my childhood was missing.
Thats the last thing I remember and then I woke up in this Dutch kids dorm and he was taking a picture of me while I was sleeping
she's walking down the hall in a thong and one flip flop and one ugg
If Amber from Teen Mom can get a new boyfriend, so can I.
It was really weird walking into a CVS and not going straight to the pharmacy for plan B.
I pissed myself at the bar so I threw away my wet underwear and kept partying... you act you've never done that before
Found a piece of twizzler in my buttcrack.
I just had sex with the megalodon show on in the background and it was just as magical as it sounds
Its 11am and I'm eating gummi bears and drinking Tennessee honey in my underwear...this is why I'm self employed
He got you flowers. How bad can the sex really be?
YOLO is a great motto until you end up with Chlamydia
God gave you your own nipples for a reason.
This town reeks of teen pregnancy.
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