im officially scared..,i finally realized who my boyfriend reminds me of! spencer pratt
Hey Operation Dumbo Drop... FYI, when you select your date this evening, our doorway is 3'x7'
getting your period on valentines day is like an extra little fuck you, now you REALLY have no chance of sex tonight.
I found her sitting in the shower having an argument with the dolphins on the shower curtain.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well i tried snorting sugar. so either that made me puke or the fact that i drank water from a fish tank
He kept telling me how extraordinarily clean my ears were.
I'm sure me singing - rather loudly - "fuck me in the back seat" last night didn't help either.
I sat on the toilet and peed through my jeans, then I pissed the bed and blamed him...do you think well have a 2nd date?
Apparently from about 3-5AM I was consoling that crying stripper about her life choices.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Would be in best interest to sanitize the DVDs
I didn't know where we were going to start fucking, so I just strategically hid condoms all over the house before he came over.
Try to make ecstasy cheese. Capitalize on the molly and greek yogurt trends. MARKETING
Gay bathhouses. They're actually a thing. So god does exist. And he doesn't hate me as much as you think he does
Not sure. He doesn't know where New York is on a map but he gives an incredible spanking.
Who cares about New York?
Update: day 5 and Scott has not left the apartment. Still smoking. Pizza roll supply dwindling.
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