i'm three days dirty after drinking 14 hours last night and some other questionable behavior (hula hooping at a large concert, for example) i will just always bring the class. and the sluttiness.
Omg I def was not. I wasn't that drunk. I showed that I stuff my bra but I didn't whip my tit out.
my professor just said "the power of the situation"
drink
If im paying 4grand for laser eye surgery, it better help with beer goggles cuz last night was pretty rough.
It was literally like being eaten out by a dog. That bad.
Lemme guess, I was the one completely shit faced making out with the 50 year old...
LOL, wrong number bro. Good luck trying to figure out what happened though..
The stoned girl at the dining hall just handed me a single chicken wing and insisted that she's "unable to procure more rations"
do you want to shower with me?
only if we can drink the jungle juice while we shower
I'm gunna send you baby bottles of vodka for those nights when you just give up
This morning confirmed it...there's no maybe about it. She definitely wasn't born with it. It was definitely the Maybelline.
Going to the ER, I'll explain later but apparently drunk me isn't allergic to peanut butter.
An "unreasonable amount of ejaculate" isn't a reason to be angry at me.
For both our sake, we've decided to ban watching combat sports before sex
Would I do it again? Probably not but still,I don't regret a single ratchet thing I've done in college.
no real plans this weekend. trying to derail the alcohol induced fucking hell train I've been riding for the past three weeks.
Randomize
