I have on cowboy boots and a ten gallon hat. I'd say I'm a little past tipsy
he has officially spend more money on me than any other boy. and its all gone to plan b. awesome.
btw good call for not making out for a pitcher of vodka, this hangover is bad enough
I think it's our patriotic duty to get high and watch the state of the union tonight
He came, while we were making out fully clothed. I'm going to write a book.
just letting you know, you took a hit of the blunt while sleeping. happy birthday
Can we have a celebratory fuck now that the lockout is over?
You're the best girlfriend ever.
You were sitting on the filthy kitchen floor eating a packet of grated cheese, and you were crying because you couldn't find any cheese.. I'd say our party was a success.
im so proud of her that she got shit faced finally. This must be what it feels like to see you kids get their diploma or some shit.
Sadly, she's the porn star that got away
The inflatable penis from those pics was mine... We broke him that night
Great news. I WILL BE FUCKING IN A BOUNCY HOUSE TOMORROW.
Nah, I was done when the Big Pun lookalike began to sob and tell me I looked like his ex...
I went to the hospital to have my arm checked out, and they already knew the story. They gave me props for posting photos on facebook before even coming to the hospital.
i don't want him to see me in a bathing suit.
hasn't he seen you naked?
well yeah, but it's different in a bathing suit.
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