We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
i just had sex. the condom broke. we're sleeping in to separate beds. And im in albany
I know they r crazy. However porn on a big screen is an easy commitment. They come with mute, stop, fast fwd and replay buttons. if only all women came that way...
One of my other friends found me and the dog in the back seat of this one guy's car....I don't even know
Yes I was being legit. That's the only plant I want in my house. A growing penis.
It's been decided..lingerie is an investment. You get free breakfast and cab rides out of it.
last nights episode of shot friends brought to you by polish vodka and flamingo baseball. pickles cure hangovers.
There's nothing worse than carrying your fairy crown and wings home wearing fishnets
He's way too stoned. I took him to el bra and he's laying on the table, not sure what to do with him
Is she okay?
She may want to issue revenge punches, but medically fine.
No way in hell. Unless I was drunk Tindering again....my swiping finger gets drunk too I guess
I can see your house from here
Get off of his fucking roof
I hate the cold months. Everybody starts hibernating and I start talking to guys I would never normally talk to. You have a drug habit and no license? Perfect candidate for a boyfriend...
I'll give you some leg action but I'm not showing you anything else until your penis admits it loves me
You smoked too much and passed out, didn't you?
You know me so well.
Randomize
