WORST DINGLEBERRY EVER
They have edible shot glasses at target.
There really is a God.
I don't make the first move. Ever. Unless were playing monopoly cause that's my shit
Do they take checks?
Did you really just ask me if you could write a check for a DRUG DEAL?
On my way home I stopped at target and bought beer and galoshes. I am a planner.
let's see, i ended up walking for an hour towards a macdonalds that didnt exist, sprinted full tilt into a powerline, and left a 30 dollar tip to a waitress at dennys we made friends with. I REGRET NOTHING
All three roommates are gay and in women's studies. Ive already been informed that all penetration is rape. This is not the college experience I signed up for.
only thing in my fruit bowl is 4 champagne corks and a jenga piece . Tuesday.
I woke wondering who the hell was in my bed. Then i felt boobs and remembered Haha. Thirsty Thursday killed my liver and my homosexuality
He's bringing a lesbian pretending to be his girlfriend to family Christmas. I can not wait to see how this goes.
I mean I've only met the girl once and she was trying to slit some guys tires.
there's crying, and people are upset, and there's a love triangle, and a broken heart, and so much estrogen
Damn. Looks like nobody I know is doing anything interesting. Guess it's another slut-it-up-with-strangers sort of night.
Almost gave the delivery guy a 34 dollar tip. That high
Soooo you're telling me you support us groom's men giving lap dances to willing patrons?
Randomize
